So, I’ve been really bad at keeping up with this blog. I’ve been really sick lately, and with that and work, I have pretty much been a vegetable. I am happy though, that this flu or cold or whatever it is, seems to be on its last legs. I just can’t shake the cough, and the nasty phlegm as a result of it. DayQuil helps a bit, but it seems to worsen once it wears off. Thankfully, my vacation is coming up in less than a week and I can focus on getting better for real, without work getting in the way.
Work has been getting better. I just… decided one night that I wasn’t going to let people and their stupid shit get to me anymore. Once I came to that decision, my productivity has gone up and I feel better. Hope has been trying to drag me into things, but I’ve just kind of let it go in one ear and out the other. Of course, work related issues I still go to Mike or Brandon with. Brandon seems to be most receptive and he’s good for either dealing with it right away or relaying it to Mike. I can honestly say that for the first time in… well, forever, I’m content at work. Of course, that being said, I’ve probably jinxed myself and shit will hit the fan. LOL.
I’m hoping to get some work done on the site in the next couple days… I know I always say that, but I always get distracted and this time, I’m going to keep those distractions to a minimum if possible. I’m going to have the house to myself, and I’ll make sure to be loaded up with goodies and SKR and just git-r-done. I’m excited. In the meantime, though, I did change the featured video in the goodies section. I’ve been meaning to do that for a while.
Off to get ready for work.
Life has gotten so far away from me. I didn’t even realize how late we were into June, or that it was even June at all, until this morning when I was making plans for my vacation time and saw how close it is. It’s kind of funny how that is. I’ve been so stressed from everything that’s been happening, and of course the stress is making me ill, so I find that my attention span is… lacking, to say the least. Hopefully now that things are possibly calming down, I can catch up. I hate feeling out of control of the things in my life. I hate that feeling of spiraling and not being able to stop.
Work is a constant source of stress. I’m trying to ignore all of the drama, but it just doesn’t seem to be working. I’ve begun to actually loathe the idea entirely of going to work. Which… for me is pretty big because I used to really love my job. My new manager, Mike, is never around. When he is, he’s off on his own planet and when I try to talk to him about the problems I’m having, I can barely get two words out of my mouth before he runs off again. My new support manager Brandon, is (as Bryce so eloquently put it) a bird brain. He doesn’t think things through, and more often than not, I have to call him and tell him I’m unable to do the task he’s given me because there is either no room to put the merchandise out or he’s given me no direction. I would normally figure things out for myself, but all changes have to have managerial approval, or else I get in trouble. Which… doesn’t make sense to me because they’re always nagging us to take the initiative. My other support manager, Ron, is a hardcore racist and talks trash about everyone, including me, even through I’ve never done anything to him to warrant that kind of treatment. Things with co-workers are getting worse as well. There are two individuals in particular that just… eat at my nerves. I understand that neither of them like me, which is fine. Lots of people don’t like me, and it’s something I’ve come to terms with it. The problem that I’m having is that the both of them are so immature about it, and they’re over twice my age. It’s hard to deal with because I don’t know how to respond. I’m being polite and professional and trying to ignore them, but it’s getting progressively worse and I don’t know how to handle it. I’ve never really been in this kind of situation and it aggravates me. I’m going to corner Mike and tell him about it. I’ll block the door until he talks to me.
After a particularly stressful night last night, I went for a walk downtown this morning to enjoy the nice weather. Along my travels, I ducked into the book store and picked up a copy of The Stranger Beside Me by Ann Rule, and the premier issue of a delightful tattoo culture magazine called Bound By Ink. The new Anita Blake novel is out, but I won’t be able to afford it for awhile, which depressed me a bit. Hardcovers are so expensive, and most of my favourite authors come out with hardcovers. Usually I’m not patient enough for the soft covers, but it looks like this time I might have to be.
I’ve been listening to this song a lot… and it’s striking chords inside of me that I didn’t even know I had. I think I’m in love. <3
